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"It little profits that an idle king, By this still hearth, among these barren crags, Match'd with an agèd wife, I mete and dole Unequal laws unto a savage race, That hoard, and sleep, and feed, and know not me."

Friday, September 23, 2005

Why we needn't fear China!

There is so much talk about the 2008 Beijing Olympics, and how China is running mass English language programmes, so that every man (woman, child...) will be fluent in English. Naysayers in India feel that this should be end of the BPO (aka call centre) road for India, because once the Chinese master English, our only competitive advantage would be challenged.

But here's something we can take heart from. If the following is true, millions of Indian who make a living by faking their voices and names can rest assured.

Room Service (RS): "Morrin. Roon sirbees."

Guest (G): "Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service."

RS: "Rye..Roon sirbees..morrin! Jewish to oddor sunteen??"

G: "Uh..yes..I'd like some bacon and eggs."

RS: "Ow July den?"

G: "What??"

RS: "Ow July den?...pryed, boyud, poochd?"

G: "Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry, scrambled please."

RS: "Ow July dee baykem? Crease?"

G: "Crisp will be fine."

RS: "Hokay. An Sahn toes?"

G: "What?"

RS: "An toes. July Sahn toes?"

G: "I don't think so."

RS: "No? Judo wan sahn toes??"

G: "I feel really bad about this, but I don't know what 'judo wan sahn toes means."

RS: "Toes! toes!...Why jew don juan toes? Ow bow Anglish moppin we bodder?"

G: "English muffin!! I've got it! You were saying 'Toast.' Fine. Yes, an English muffin will be fine."

RS: "We bodder?"

G: "No...just put the bodder on the side."

RS: "Wad?"

G: "I mean butter...just put it on the side."

RS: "Copy?"

G: "Excuse me?"

RS: "Copy...tea...meel?"

G: "Yes. Coffee, please, and that's all."

RS: "One Minnie. Scramah egg, crease baykem, Anglish moppin we bodder on sigh and copy....rye??"

G: "Whatever you say."

RS: "Tenjewberrymuds."

G: "You're very welcome."

4 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

i don't know what more you can expect from a room service person. our ppl aren't any better. that's a bad comparison.

9/24/2005 08:34:00 AM  
Blogger Vijay Krishna Narayanan said...

Come genius, in which part of India can you expect such "service"?

And as for the bad comparison thing, do remember that the piece is on the lighter side.

9/24/2005 09:42:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I still don't get it. What are "Tenjewberrymuds."

10/17/2005 08:21:00 AM  
Blogger Vijay Krishna Narayanan said...

Arrrgh! Thank you very much!

10/17/2005 08:43:00 AM  

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